Unconditional Belonging
The faithful son said to his father:
“Look, I have been slaving many years for you, and I have never disobeyed your orders […]. But when this son of yours came, who has devoured your assets with prostitutes, you slaughtered the fattened calf for him.”
“Son”, the father said to him, “you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. But we had to celebrate and rejoice, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.”
– Luke 15:29-32 [HCSB]
Can you envision it? The father’s feasting hall on his country estate; it sits atop rolling hills – fields of crops to the horizon. Many family meals have taken place there. A lot of laughter, history, and shared memories.
When the wayward son comes home, all he hopes for is to eat with the hired hands. He knows he deserves less. He doesn’t have the courage to even hope to be recognized as family.
But what does he find?
His Father has a place set for him at the family’s feasting table.
His spot at the family table is still there.
Despite his poor decisions and outright betrayal of his Father and family – there is a setting at the family table with his name on the place card. Further, the feast is to celebrate him.
Sarah and I know any one of our children could decide to leave the path we currently tread as a family – the path further into God’s Kingdom.
Every evening Sarah and I pray they choose to keep going.
But we also make a point to let them know they will always have a place at God’s table – and at our table. It often happens in passing, or when we are tucking them in bed.
I will say their name to get their attention.
They look at me.
I hold their gaze for a few seconds and then, I say something like this:
“I love you, ______. You are a part of me. Nothing you can do will change that. No matter what you do, you will always have a place here. Do you understand that?”
The reaction is mixed. Sometimes they dismiss it as “typical daddy”. Sometimes they nod with seriousness. Most of the time they giggle – why would I say such a silly thing?
I’ll often get misty-eyed as I turn my head away from the exchange, because their giggles tell me my love is assumed – and that is a thing of beauty. But I also tear up because I know from experience that some day the full weight of this promise to them might be all that holds them up.
Love consists in this: not that we loved God, but that He loved us […], If God loved us in this way, we also must love one another. We love because He first loved us.
– I John 4:4-21