Weaning and Walking

There are strenuous seasons in parenting. And there are also tough seasons as we journey with God. When the two coincide we get worn thin and are tempted to despair. We feel abandoned.

When we feel alone we start to think God isn’t present in the way He used to be. And we are right... but He has not abandoned us.

This is exactly what spiritual writers in the early Church were describing when they spoke of God “withdrawing” from us.

To them, these seasons were normal and necessary seasons of spiritual growth. They recognized that in normal spiritual growth everyone went through these seasons where God seemed to withdraw from them.

As they sought to explain these difficult seasons they used analogies of human development. They compared these seasons to an infant being weaned, or a child learning to walk.

The first analogy is from Scripture. And by examining those texts they concluded: early in our journey with God it is delightful and easy – vey much like being bottle-fed or nursing at our mother’s breast. That food is the most basic spiritual nourishment. During that season we are growing in our attachment to God. We need Him near.

But the ultimate goal is to grow up and become co-laborers with God. And for that, we need to consume spiritual food that requires chewing, not as easy to digest, and isn’t as sweet. Initially we want to spit that food out and cry for milk. It doesn’t seem like nourishment at all. It feels like distance from the one we need and love. It feels like torture.

But God persists saying, “No, you need something more.” We mourn the loss of the immediate comfort and sweetness. We might even throw a fit or panic, saying: “Maybe God was just a beautiful dream.”

But if we persevere we discover the nourishment He had for us – rather than the nourishment we wanted – was exactly what we needed to grow us beyond infancy.

The analogy of ‘a toddler learning to walk’ works in a similar way: God is withdrawing so we learn how to take a few steps toward Him on our own. Once that is done He gives us encouragement – letting us know we did well and that He really is never far off. But then He walks away again. This time a bit further.

Through this repetition we learn He is never too far away. But we also learn to journey toward Him without having our hand held. Eventually we learn to follow in His footsteps – even when He isn’t facing us to encourage us forward.

In maturity we are ready for a bigger adventure with Him through various conditions and over a variety of terrain. We learn to climb obstacles.

But even mature believers have seasons when God seems to take an abrupt turn, He leads us up steep inclines, or we simply struggle to keep pace and keep Him in sight.

God leading us "further up and further in" can feel like God running away from us.

But you are His child. In difficult parenting as well as lonely spiritual seasons know that He is for you, not against you. You are His own flesh and blood.

Look, I am with you and will watch over you wherever you go. […] for I will not leave you until I have done what I have promised you.
– Genesis 28:15

The LORD is the One who will go before you. He will be with you; He will not leave you or forsake you. Do not be afraid or discouraged.
– Deuteronomy 31:8

If we are faithless, He remains faithful, for He cannot deny Himself.
– 2 Timothy 2:13